Going Crazy

I'm having one of those days where I just feel like I'm going freaking INSANE, and I just want to get out of the house. I want to go somewhere, do something, almost anything, because I'm going nuts trapped here in this house with just me and my mind.

Going crazy. Get me out. Get me out.

I just want to run & run, to run as fast and far as I can, as if I could escape the madness in my head.

I want to go somewhere with music so loud that I can't hear my own thoughts anymore.

I want to drown in smoke and booze and other people's bodies until I can't feel, can't remember anything else.

I want to scream, and shoot things, and punch, and cry, until all the pain is out.

I want to burn. Fire, like a blessing, burning everything out.

And there is nothing. And I sit here, going quietly insane. Again. Again. Another night, another empty pointless moment. Sitting. Waiting.